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TRÁI TIM
MẸ: NƠI CON NƯƠNG NÁU - ĐƯỜNG ĐẾN VỚI CHÚA |
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"Chúa Giêsu muốn dùng con để làm
cho Mẹ được nhận biết và yêu mến" |
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August 28-30/2009 - Friday to
22nd
Sunday of Ordinary Time
LITURGICAL/THEME MEDITATION:
The foolish
will miss heaven’s wedding feast;
"Herod
feared John, knowing that he was a righteous and holy man";
"Out of the
heart come evil thoughts"
UNIVERSAL CHURCH/WORLD EVENT(S):
Scientist: Pope Was Right
About AIDS;
On Mary, Mother of Priests;
Priest, Who Are You?
SAINT OF THE DAY
St. Augustine;
Martyrdom of John the Baptist;
St. Jeanne Jugan
GENERAL
MARIOLOGY
THE DIVINE
HISTORY AND LIFE
OF THE
VIRGIN MOTHER OF GOD
Book Five -
Chapter III
THE CONTINUED
PRAYERS OF JESUS AND MARY FOR MANKIND.
DIVINE MERCY
Divine Mercy in My Soul
NOTEBOOK V
TEACHING/TESTIMONY/CONVICTION:
Testimony of Nita Whitten,
former Abortion Provider
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DAILY LITURGICAL MEDITATION |
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Friday (8/28): The foolish will miss
heaven’s wedding feast
Scripture: Matthew 25:1-13
1 "Then the kingdom of heaven shall be compared to ten maidens who
took their lamps and went to meet the bridegroom. 2 Five of them were
foolish, and five were wise. 3 For when the foolish took their lamps,
they took no oil with them; 4 but the wise took flasks of oil with their
lamps. 5 As the bridegroom was delayed, they all slumbered and slept. 6
But at midnight there was a cry, `Behold, the bridegroom! Come out to
meet him.' 7 Then all those maidens rose and trimmed their lamps. 8 And
the foolish said to the wise, `Give us some of your oil, for our lamps
are going out.' 9 But the wise replied, `Perhaps there will not be
enough for us and for you; go rather to the dealers and buy for
yourselves.' 10 And while they went to buy, the bridegroom came, and
those who were ready went in with him to the marriage feast; and the
door was shut. 11 Afterward the other maidens came also, saying, `Lord,
lord, open to us.' 12 But he replied, `Truly, I say to you, I do not
know you.' 13 Watch therefore, for you know neither the day nor the
hour.
Meditation: Are you missing out on what's most important in
life? Being unprepared can lead to unnecessary trouble and even
disaster! What good is a life-jacket left on the shore when the boat is
sinking? Jesus’story of ten single ladies waiting for a wedding
procession in the middle of the night seems strange to most westerners
today. But Jesus' audience knew all too well how easily this could
happen to them. Wedding customs in ancient Palestine required extra
vigilance and preparation for everyone involved. (Some near eastern
villages still follow this custom.) The bride and groom did not go away
for their honeymoon, but celebrated for a whole week with their family
and friends. It was the custom for the groom, in company with his
friends, to come at his discretion and get his bride and bring her to
their new home. They would take the longest route possible so that many
villagers along the way could join in the wedding procession. Once they
arrived and closed the doors, no one else could be admitted. If the
groom decided to come and bring his bride at night, then lights were
required by necessity to guide the travelers through the dark and narrow
streets. No one was allowed on the village streets at night without a
lamp! To show up for a wedding party without proper attire and travel
arrangements is like trying to get into a special event today that
requires a prearranged permit or reservation. You just don’t get in
without the proper pass. Can you imagine the frustration travelers might
experience when going abroad and finding out that they can’t get into
some country because they dont have the right visa or a valid passport.
Jesus warns us that there are consequences for being unprepared.
There are certain things you cannot obtain at the last moment. For
example, students cannot prepare for their exams when the day of testing
is already upon them. A person cannot get the right kind of character,
strength, and skill required for a task at hand unless they already
possess it, such as a captain with courage and nautical skills who must
steer a ship through a dangerous storm at sea. When the Lord Jesus comes
to lead you to his heavenly banquet will you be ready to hear his voice
and follow? Our eternal welfare depends on our hearing, and many have
trained themselves to not hear. We will not be prepared to meet the
Lord, face to face, when he calls us on the day of judgment, unless we
listen to him today. The Lord invites us to feast at his heavenly
banquet table. Are you ready?
“Lord Jesus, make me vigilant and attentive to your voice that I may
heed your call at all times. May I find joy in your presence and delight
in doing your will.”
Psalm 33:1-5,10-11
1 Rejoice in the LORD, O you righteous! Praise befits the upright.
2 Praise the LORD with the lyre, make melody to him with the harp of ten
strings!
3 Sing to him a new song, play skilfully on the strings, with loud
shouts.
4 For the word of the LORD is upright; and all his work is done in
faithfulness.
5 He loves righteousness and justice; the earth is full of the steadfast
love of the LORD.
10 The LORD brings the counsel of the nations to nought; he frustrates
the plans of the peoples.
11 The counsel of the LORD stands for ever, the thoughts of his heart to
all generations.
Saturday (8/29): "Herod feared John, knowing that he was a
righteous and holy man"
Scripture: Mark 6:17-29 (alternate reading:
Matthew 25:14-30)
17 For Herod had sent and seized John, and bound him in prison for
the sake of Hero'di-as, his brother Philip's wife; because he had
married her. 18 For John said to Herod, "It is not lawful for you to
have your brother's wife." 19 And Hero'di-as had a grudge against him,
and wanted to kill him. But she could not, 20 for Herod feared John,
knowing that he was a righteous and holy man, and kept him safe. When he
heard him, he was much perplexed; and yet he heard him gladly. 21 But
an opportunity came when Herod on his birthday gave a banquet for his
courtiers and officers and the leading men of Galilee. 22 For when
Hero'di-as' daughter came in and danced, she pleased Herod and his
guests; and the king said to the girl, "Ask me for whatever you wish,
and I will grant it." 23 And he vowed to her, "Whatever you ask me, I
will give you, even half of my kingdom." 24 And she went out, and said
to her mother, "What shall I ask?" And she said, "The head of John the
baptizer." 25 And she came in immediately with haste to the king, and
asked, saying, "I want you to give me at once the head of John the
Baptist on a platter." 26 And the king was exceedingly sorry; but
because of his oaths and his guests he did not want to break his word to
her. 27 And immediately the king sent a soldier of the guard and gave
orders to bring his head. He went and beheaded him in the prison, 28 and
brought his head on a platter, and gave it to the girl; and the girl
gave it to her mother. 29 When his disciples heard of it, they came and
took his body, and laid it in a tomb.
Meditation: Are you prepared to be a witness, and if
necessary, a martyr for Jesus Christ? John the Baptist bridged the Old
and New Testaments. He is the last of the Old Testament prophets who
pointed the way to the Messiah. He is the first of the New Testament
witnesses and martyrs. Jesus equated the coming of his kingdom with
violence. From the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of
heaven has suffered violence, and men of violence take it by force
(Matthew 11:12). John suffered violence for announcing that the
kingdom of God was near. He was thrown into prison and then beheaded.
Why did Herod put John to death when he knew him to be a righteous
and holy man? Herod was a weak ruler. He could take a strong stand
on the wrong things when he knew the right. Such a stand, however, was a
sign of weakness and cowardice. Unfortunately for Herod, he could not
rid himself of sin by ridding himself of the man who confronted him with
his sin.
Since John's martyrdom to the present times the kingdom of heaven has
suffered violence and persecution at the hands of violent people. The
blood of Christian martyrs throughout the ages bear witness to this
fact. Their testimony to the truth of the gospel and their willingness
to suffer and die for their faith prove victory rather than defeat for
the kingdom of God. Through Christ's victory on the cross they obtain
the glorious crown of victory and everlasting life with Jesus Christ.
What gives us the power, boldness, and courage to witness to Jesus
Christ and to the truth of the gospel? The Holy Spirit fills us with
courage, love, and boldness to make Jesus Christ known and loved. We do
not need to fear those who oppose the gospel, because the love of Jesus
Christ is stronger than fear and death itself. His love conquers all,
even our fears and timidity in the face of opposition and persecution.
We can trust in his grace and help at all times. Are you ready to make
Christ known and loved, and if necessary to suffer for his sake and the
sake of the gospel?
"Lord Jesus Christ, give me faith, boldness, and courage to stand
firm in the truth of the gospel and to not waver in my testimony of your
love and grace. Give me hope and joy in the promise of everlasting life
with you in your kingdom."
Psalm 71:1-6,15,17
1 In thee, O LORD, do I take refuge; let me never be put to shame!
2 In thy righteousness deliver me and rescue me; incline thy ear to me,
and save me!
3 Be thou to me a rock of refuge, a strong fortress, to save me, for
thou art my rock and my fortress.
4 Rescue me, O my God, from the hand of the wicked, from the grasp of
the unjust and cruel man.
5 For thou, O Lord, art my hope, my trust, O LORD, from my youth.
6 Upon thee I have leaned from my birth; thou art he who took me from my
mother's womb. My praise is continually of thee.
15 My mouth will tell of thy righteous acts, of thy deeds of salvation
all the day, for their number is past my knowledge.
16 With the mighty deeds of the Lord GOD I will come, I will praise thy
righteousness, thine alone.
17 O God, from my youth thou hast taught me, and I still proclaim thy
wondrous deeds.
Sunday (8/30): "Out of the heart come evil thoughts"
Scripture: Mark 7:1-8, 14-15, 21-23
1 Now when the Pharisees gathered together to him, with some of the
scribes, who had come from Jerusalem, 2 they saw that some of his
disciples ate with hands defiled, that is, unwashed. 3 (For the
Pharisees, and all the Jews, do not eat unless they wash their
hands, observing the tradition of the elders; 4 and when they come
from the market place, they do not eat unless they purify
themselves; and there are many other traditions which they observe,
the washing of cups and pots and vessels of bronze.) 5 And the
Pharisees and the scribes asked him, "Why do your disciples not live
according to the tradition of the elders, but eat with hands
defiled?" 6 And he said to them, "Well did Isaiah prophesy of you
hypocrites, as it is written, `This people honors me with their
lips, but their heart is far from me; 7 in vain do they worship me,
teaching as doctrines the precepts of men.' 8 You leave the
commandment of God, and hold fast the tradition of men."
14 And he called the people to him again, and said to them, "Hear
me, all of you, and understand: 15 there is nothing outside a man
which by going into him can defile him; but the things which come
out of a man are what defile him."
21 For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts,
fornication, theft, murder, adultery, 22 coveting, wickedness,
deceit, licentiousness, envy, slander, pride, foolishness. 23 All
these evil things come from within, and they defile a man."
Meditation: What makes a person unclean or unfit to offer God
acceptable worship? The Jews went to great pains to ensure that their
worship would conform to the instructions which God gave to Moses on
Mount Sinai. God's call to his people was a call to holiness: "be holy,
for I am holy" (Leviticus 11:44; 19:2). In their zeal for holiness many
elders developed elaborate traditions which became a burden for the
people to carry out in their everyday lives. The Scribes and Pharisees
were upset with Jesus because he allowed his disciples to break with
their ritual traditions by eating with unclean hands. They sent a
delegation all the way from Jerusalem to Galilee to bring their
accusation in a face-to-face confrontation with Jesus. Jesus dealt with
their accusation by going to the heart of the matter – by looking at
God's intention and purpose for the commandments.
Jesus explains that they void God's command because they allow their
hearts and minds to be clouded by their own notions of what is true
religion. Jesus accuses them specifically of two things. First of
hypocrisy. Like actors, who put on a show, they appear to obey God's
word in their external practices while they inwardly harbor evil desires
and intentions. Secondly, he accuses them of abandoning God's word by
substituting their own arguments and ingenious interpretations for what
God requires. They devised clever arguments based on their own thoughts
rather than on God's word. Jesus refers them to the prophecy of Isaiah
(29:31) where the prophet accuses the people of his day for honoring God
with their lips while their hearts were far away from choosing and doing
what God asked of them. God's word has power to set us free from
ignorance, pride, and selfish desires. His word both enlightens our mind
and purifies our heart so that we can truly understand his ways and
intentions and walk in his love. The Lord invites us to draw near to him
and to feast at his banquet table. Do you draw near with a clean heart
and mind? Ask the Lord to cleanse you fully with the purifying fire of
his Holy Spirit.
Where does evil spring from and what's the solution for eliminating
it from our lives? Jesus deals with this issue in response to the
religious leaders' concern with ritual defilement – making oneself unfit
to offer acceptable sacrifice and worship to God. The religious leaders
were concerned with avoiding ritual defilement, some no doubt out of
fear of God, and others out of fear of pleasing other people. Jesus
points his listeners to the source of true defilement – evil desires
which come from inside a person's innermost being. Sin does not happen.
It first springs from the innermost recesses of our thoughts and
intentions, from the secret desires which only the individual soul can
conceive. God in his mercy sent his only Son Jesus to save us from our
sins. But to receive his mercy, we must admit our faults. "If we say
we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we
confess our sins, he is faithful and just, and will forgive our sins and
cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (1 John 1:8-9). Only God can change
our hearts and make them clean and whole through the power of the Holy
Spirit. Like a physician who probes the wound before treating it, God
through his Word and Spirit first brings it to light that we may
recognize it for what it is and call upon his mercy and grace for pardon
and healing. The Spirit of truth is the Consoler. The Spirit gives us
a true conscience and the assurance that Christ our redeemer forgives
all of our sins when we turn to the Lord Jesus and ask for his help and
mercy.
How can we live in holiness free from slavery to sin and hurtful
desires? When Cain was jealous of his brother, Abel, God warned him to
guard his heart: "Sin is couching at the door; it's desire is for you,
but you must master it" (Genesis 4:7). Do you allow any sinful desires
to couch at the door of your heart? We do not need to entertain or give
into sinful desires and hurtful thoughts, but instead, through the grace
of God, we can choose to put them to death rather than allow them
mastery over us. The Lord is every ready to change and purify our hearts
through his Holy Spirit who dwells within us. His power and grace
enables us to choose what is good and to reject what is evil. Do you
believe in the power of God's love to change and transform your heart?
"Lord Jesus, fill me with your Holy Spirit and make my heart like
yours – on fire with love and holiness. Strengthen my will that I may
always choose to love what is good and to reject what is evil."
Psalm 15:1-5
1 O LORD, who shall sojourn in thy tent? Who shall dwell on thy holy
hill?
2 He who walks blamelessly, and does what is right, and speaks truth
from his heart;
3 who does not slander with his tongue, and does no evil to his friend,
nor takes up a reproach against his neighbor;
4 in whose eyes a reprobate is despised, but who honors those who fear
the LORD; who swears to his own hurt and does not change;
5 who does not put out his money at interest, and does not take a bribe
against the innocent. He who does these things shall never be moved.
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UNIVERSAL CHURCH/WORLD EVENTS |
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Scientist: Pope Was Right About AIDS
Says Abstinence, Fidelity More Effective than Condoms
RIMINI, Italy, AUG. 27, 2009 ( Zenit.org).- The director of Harvard's AIDS Prevention Research Project is affirming that Benedict XVI's position was right in the debate on AIDS and condoms.
Edward Green stated this in an address at the 30th annual Meeting for Friendship Among Peoples in Rimini, sponsored by the lay movement, Communion and Liberation.
Green, an expert on AIDS prevention, said that "as a scientist he was amazed to see the closeness between what the Pope said last March in Cameroon and the results of the most recent scientific discoveries."
He affirmed: "The condom does not prevent AIDS. Only responsible sexual behavior can address the pandemic."
Green continued, "When Benedict XVI said that different sexual behavior should be adopted in Africa, because to put trust in condoms does not serve to fight against AIDS, the international press was scandalized."
The Pope made this statement in a meeting with journalists en route to Africa last March.
The scientist affirmed that the Holy Father spoke the truth. He noted, "The condom can work for particular individuals, but it will not serve to address the situation of a continent."
Change habits
Green added: "To propose the regular use of the condom as prevention in Africa could have the opposite effect."
He explained the phenomenon of human behavior called "risk compensation," whereby a person "feels protected and thus exposes himself more."
The researcher and medical anthropologist asked: "Why has an attempt not been made to change people's customs?"
"The world industry has taken many years to understand that measures of a technical and medical character are of no use to solve the problem," he added.
Green highlighted the successful policies that have been implemented in Uganda to battle AIDS, programs based in the "ABC" strategy: "Abstain, Be faithful, and, as a last resource, use a Condom."
He reported: "In the case of Uganda, an impressive result has been obtained in the fight against AIDS.
"The president was able to tell the truth to his people, to young people, that on occasions some sacrifice, abstinence and fidelity are necessary.
"The result has been formidable."
On Mary, Mother of Priests
"The Perfect Model for Their Existence"
CASTEL GANDOLFO, Italy, AUG. 27, 2009 ( Zenit.org).- Here is a Vatican translation of the address Benedict XVI gave Aug. 12 during the general audience given at his summer residence in Castel Gandolfo.
* * *
Dear Brothers and Sisters,
The celebration of the Solemnity of the Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary, next Saturday, is at hand and we are in the context of the Year for Priests. I therefore wish to speak of the link between Our Lady and the priesthood. This connection is deeply rooted in the Mystery of the Incarnation.
When God decided to become man in his Son, he needed the freely-spoken "yes" of one of his creatures. God does not act against our freedom. And something truly extraordinary happens: God makes himself dependent on the free decision, the "yes" of one of his creatures; he waits for this "yes".
St Bernard of Clairvaux explained dramatically in one of his homilies this crucial moment in universal history when Heaven, earth and God himself wait for what this creature will say.
Mary's "yes" is therefore the door through which God was able to enter the world, to become man. So it is that Mary is truly and profoundly involved in the Mystery of the Incarnation, of our salvation. And the Incarnation, the Son's becoming man, was the beginning that prepared the ground for the gift of himself; for giving himself with great love on the Cross to become Bread for the life of the world. Hence sacrifice, priesthood and Incarnation go together and Mary is at the heart of this mystery.
Let us now go to the Cross. Before dying, Jesus sees his Mother beneath the Cross and he sees the beloved son. This beloved son is certainly a person, a very important individual, but he is more; he is an example, a prefiguration of all beloved disciples, of all the people called by the Lord to be the "beloved disciple" and thus also particularly of priests.
Jesus says to Mary: "Woman, behold, your son!" (Jn 19: 26). It is a sort of testament: he entrusts his Mother to the care of the son, of the disciple. But he also says to the disciple: "Behold, your mother!" (Jn 19: 27).
The Gospel tells us that from that hour St John, the beloved son, took his mother Mary "to his own home".
This is what it says in the [English] translation; but the Greek text is far deeper, far richer. We could translate it: he took Mary into his inner life, his inner being, "eis tà ìdia", into the depths of his being.
To take Mary with one means to introduce her into the dynamism of one's own entire existence it is not something external and into all that constitutes the horizon of one's own apostolate.
It seems to me that one can, therefore, understand how the special relationship of motherhood that exists between Mary and priests may constitute the primary source, the fundamental reason for her special love for each one of them.
In fact, Mary loves them with predilection for two reasons: because they are more like Jesus, the supreme love of her heart, and because, like her, they are committed to the mission of proclaiming, bearing witness to and giving Christ to the world.
Because of his identification with and sacramental conformation to Jesus, Son of God and Son of Mary, every priest can and must feel that he really is a specially beloved son of this loftiest and humblest of Mothers.
The Second Vatican Council invites priests to look to Mary as to the perfect model for their existence, invoking her as "Mother of the supreme and eternal Priest, as Queen of Apostles, and as Protectress of their ministry". The Council continues, "priests should always venerate and love her, with a filial devotion and worship" (cf. Presbyterorum Ordinis, n. 18).
The Holy Curé d'Ars, whom we are remembering in particular in this Year, used to like to say: "Jesus Christ, after giving us all that he could give us, wanted further to make us heirs to his most precious possession, that is, his Holy Mother (B. Nodet, Il pensiero e l'anima del Curato d'Ars, Turin 1967, p. 305).
This applies for every Christian, for all of us, but in a special way for priests. Dear brothers and sisters, let us pray that Mary will make all priests, in all the problems of today's world, conform with the image of her Son Jesus, as stewards of the precious treasure of his love as the Good Shepherd. Mary, Mother of priests, pray for us!
Priest, Who Are You?
Photo Exhibition Explores Vocation
CANCUN, Mexico, AUG. 27, 2009 ( Zenit.org).- The diocese of Cancun-Chetumanal is promoting culture and art along with the priestly vocation in a unique traveling photographic exhibition.
The diocese, headed by Bishop Pedro Pablo Elizondo, organized this initiative surrounding the Priestly Year, which began in June.
The exhibition titled "Priest, Who Are You?" is the first project of its kind in Mexico.
The project has seven parts, containing some 300 photos, and will be progressively displayed at important moments in the life of the diocese's priests.
The first part consists of over 40 photographs with text and images that aim to reflect the real and spiritual meaning of God's ministers, and their work of preaching, service, and pastoral care of souls.
This first section of the project was opened by the bishop on Aug. 15 at Our Lady of St. John of the Lakes, following a Mass celebrated by the pastor and official promoter of the exhibition, Legionary Father Mario Gonzalez.
In the Mass also opened the official construction of the new Church for the parish, with a blessing of the first stone.
Parishes throughout the state of Quintana Roo, on the Yucatan Peninsula, can request and receive the exhibition to create a venue of culture and artistic appreciation for their communities.
The display, which is free, is open to the public and is currently located in the parish of Our Lady of St. John of the Lakes, in Cancun.
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GENERAL
MARIOLOGY |
THE DIVINE HISTORY AND
LIFE
OF THE
VIRGIN MOTHER OF GOD
BOOK FIVE
Concerning
the Perfection with which the most Holy Mary copied and
Imitated
the Activity of the Soul of Christ; how the Incarnate Word
Instructed
Her in the Laws of grace, the Articles of Faith, the
Sacraments, the Ten Commandments; and with what
Alacrity
and Noble Promptitude She Corresponded.
Also
concerning the Death of Saint Joseph, the
Preaching
of Saint John, the call of the
First
Disciples and the Baptism
Of the
Virgin Mary, our
Blessed
Lady
CHAPTER III.
THE CONTINUED PRAYERS OF JESUS AND MARY FOR MANKIND.
At all these prayers the beloved Mother was present,
and in her purest soul, as in the purest crystal, the light of the
Onlybegotten was reflected. His interior and exterior prayers re-echoed
in Her, causing Her to imitate his petitions and prayers in the same
postures. When the great Lady for the first time saw Him sweat blood,
her maternal heart was transfixed with sorrow and filled with
astonishment at the effects caused in Christ, our Lord, by the sins and
ingratitudes committed by men, foreseen by the Lord and known to Her. In
the anguish of her heart She turned to her fellow mortals and exclaimed:
"O children of men! Little do ye understand how highly the Lord esteems
his image and likeness in you! For, as the price of your salvation, He
offers his own blood and deems it little to shed all of it
for you. O could I but unite your wills with mine, in order that I might
bring you to love and obey Him! Blessed by his right hand be the
grateful and the just among men, who will be faithful children of their
Father! Let those be filled with light and with the treasures of grace,
who will respond to the ardent desires of my Lord in regard to their
salvation. Would that I could be the insignificant slave of the children
of Adam and thereby induce and assist them to put an end to their sins
and their own damnation! Lord and Master! Life and light of my soul! Who
can be so hard of heart and hostile to himself, that he should not feel
himself urged on by thy blessings? Who can be so ungrateful and so
unheedful, as to ignore thy most burning love? How can my heart bear
with men, who, being so favored by thy bounty, are so coarse and
rebellious? O children of Adam! Turn your inhuman cruelty upon me.
Afflict me and insult me as much as you will, only pay my beloved Lord
the reverence and love which you owe to his endearments. Thou, my Son
and Lord, art Light of light, Son of the eternal Father (Heb. 1, 3), as
everlasting, as immense, as infinite as He, equal to Him in essence and
attributes, being with Him one God and one supreme Majesty (John 10,
30). Thou art chosen among thousands (Cant. 5, 10), beautiful above all
the sons of men, holy, innocent and without defect of any kind. How
then, eternal God, can mortals ignore the object of their most noble
love? The Principle, which gives them existence? The End wherein
consists their eternal true happiness? O that I could give my life in
order that all might escape their error!"
Many other sentiments of burning love, far beyond the
powers of my heart and tongue, this heavenly Lady uttered in her
dove-like sincerity; and in this love, and in profoundest reverence, She
wiped the sweat from the face of her sweetest Son. At other times She
found Him in quite a different condition, shining with glory and
transfigured as afterwards on mount Tabor (Matth. 17, 2), in the midst
of a great multitude of angels, who adored Him and in the sweet harmony
of their voices gave praise and thanksgiving to the Onlybegotten of the
Father made man. These celestial voices our blessed Lady heard and She
joined hers with them. At other times this happened while He was not
transfigured; for the divine will ordained that the sensitive part of
the divine humanity of the Word should sometimes have this solace, while
at other times it should enjoy also the transfiguring overflow of the
glory of the soul into the body; yet this only at great intervals. But
whenever the heavenly Mother found Him in this state and beheld his
glorified body, or when She heard the hymns of the angels, She
participated in these delights to such an extent, that, if her spirit
had not been so strong, and if her Lord and Son had not fortified Her,
She would have lost all her natural powers; and even as it was, the holy
angels had to support the failing strength of her body on those
occasions.
Many times, when her divine Son was in one of these
states of suffering or joy, and was praying to the eternal
Father or, as it were, conferring with Him concerning the highest
mysteries of the Redemption, the Person of the Father approved or
conceded his petitions for the relief of men, or showed to the most holy
humanity of Christ the secret decrees of predestination, reprobation or
condemnation of some souls. All this our blessed Lady heard, humbling
Herself to the dust. With unequaled reverence and fear She adored the
Omnipotent, and accompanied her Son in his prayers, petitions and
thanksgivings, offered up to the eternal Father for mankind in praise of
all his inscrutable judgments. Such secrets and mysteries the most
prudent Virgin conferred in her heart, and stored them up in her memory,
converting them into the material and nourishment of her fiery love.
None of these blessings and secret favors were in her unprofitable or
fruitless. To all of them She corresponded according to the inmost
desires of her Lord. In all of them She fulfilled the highest intentions
of the Almighty, and all his works found due response from Her as far as
was possible from a mere creature.
WORDS OF THE QUEEN.
My daughter, one of the reasons why men should call
me Mother of mercy, is the knowledge of my loving desire that all be
satiated with the flood of grace and taste the sweetness of the Lord as
I myself. I call and invite all to come with me to the fountain of the
Divinity. Let the most poor and afflicted approach, for if they
respond and follow me, I will offer them my protection and help, and I
will intercede for them with my Son and obtain for them the hidden
manna, which will give to them nourishment and life (Apoc. 2,
27). Deny thyself and put off all the works of human weakness, and, by
the true light, which thou hast received concerning the works of my Son
and my own, contemplate and study thyself in this mirror, in order to
arrive at that beauty, which the highest King seeks in thee.
Since this is the most powerful means for perfection
in thy works, I wish that thou write this advice into thy heart.
Whenever thou must perform interior or exterior work, consider
beforehand whether what thou art going to say or do corresponds with the
doings of thy Lord, and whether thou hast the intention thereby to honor
thy Lord and benefit thy neighbor. As soon as thou art sure that this is
thy motive, execute thy undertaking in union with Him and in imitation
of Him; but if thou findest not this motive let the undertaking rest.
This was my invariable course in pursuing the imitation of my Lord and
Teacher though in me there was no reluctance toward the good but only
the desire of imitating Him perfectly. In this imitation consists the
fruit of his holy teaching, in which He urges us to do, what is most
pleasing and acceptable to the eternal God. Moreover from this day on be
mindful not to undertake any work, not to speak or even think any of
anything, without first asking my permission and consulting with me as
thy Mother and Teacher. And as soon as I answer thee give thanks to the
Lord; if I do not answer after continued inquiry, I promise and assure
thee on the part of the Lord, that He will, nevertheless, give thee
light as to what will be according to his most perfect will. In all
things, however, subject thyself to the guidance of thy spiritual
director, and never forget this practice!
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DIVINE MERCY
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Divine Mercy In my soul
The Mercy of the Lord I will sing Forever.
Divine Mercy in my soul.
Sr. Faustina, Diary
NOTEBOOK V
The Goodness of God.
The mercy of God, hidden in the Blessed Sacrament, the voice of the Lord who
speaks to us from the throne of mercy: Come to
Me, all of you.
Conversation of the Merciful God with a Sinful
Soul.
Jesus: Be not afraid of your Savior, O sinful
soul. I make the first move to come to you, for I know that by yourself you
are unable to lift yourself to me. Child, do not run away from your Father;
be willing to talk openly with Your God of mercy who wants to speak words of
pardon and lavish his graces on you. How dear your soul is to Me! I have
inscribed your name upon My hand; you are engraved as a deep wound in My
Heart.
Soul: Lord I hear Your voice calling me to turn
back from the path of sin, but I have neither the strength nor the courage
to do so.
Jesus: I am your strength, I will help you in the
struggle.
Soul: Lord I recognize Your holiness and I fear
You.
Jesus: My child, do you fear the God of mercy? My
holiness does not prevent Me from being merciful. Behold. for you I have
established a throne of mercy on earth - the tabernacle - and from this
throne I desire to enter into your heart. I am not surrounded by a retinue
of guards. You can come to Me at any moment, at any time; I want to speak to
you and desire to grant you grace.
Soul: Lord, I doubt that You will pardon my
numerous sins; my misery fills me with fright.
Jesus: My mercy is greater than your sins and
those of the entire World. Who can measure the extent of my goodness? For
you I descended from heaven to earth; for you I allowed Myself to be nailed
to the Cross; for you I let My Sacred Heart be pierced with a lance, thus
opening wide the source of mercy for you. Come then, with trust to draw
graces from this fountain. I never reject a contrite heart. Your misery has
disappeared in the depths of My mercy. Do not argue with Me about your
wretchedness. You will give me pleasure if you hand over to Me all your
troubles and griefs. I shall heap upon you the treasures of My grace.
Soul: You have conquered, O Lord, my stony
heart with Your goodness. In trust and humility I approach the tribunal of
Your mercy, where You yourself absolve me by the hand of your
representative. O Lord, I feel Your grace and Your peace filling my poor
soul. I feel overwhelmed by Your mercy, O Lord. You forgive me, which is
more than I dared to hope for or could imagine. Your goodness surpasses all
my desires. And now, filled with gratitude for so many graces, I invite You
to my heart. I wandered, like a prodigal child gone astray; but You did not
cease to be my Father. Increase Your mercy toward me, for You see how weak I
am.
Jesus: Child, speak no more of your misery; it is
already forgotten. Listen, My child, to what I desire to tell you. Come
close to My wounds and draw from the Fountain of Life whatever your heart
desires. Drink copiously from the Fountain of Life and you will not weary on
your journey. Look at the splendors of My mercy and do not fear the enemies
of your salvation. Glorify My mercy.
Conversation of the Merciful God with a Despairing Soul.
Jesus: O soul steeped in darkness, do not
despair. All is not yet lost. Come and confide in your God, who is love and
mercy.
But the soul, deaf even to this appeal, wraps
itself in darkness.
Jesus calls out again: My child, listen to the
voice of your merciful Father.
In the soul arises this reply, "For me there is
no mercy," and it falls into greater darkness, a despair which is a
foretaste of hell and makes it unable to draw near to God.
Jesus calls to the souls a third time, but the soul remains deaf and blind,
hardened and despairing. Then the mercy of God begins to exert itself, and,
without any co-operation from the soul, God grants it final grace. If this
too is spurned, God will leave the soul in this self chosen disposition for
eternity. This grace emerges from the merciful Heart of Jesus and gives the
soul a special light by means of which the soul begins to understand God's
effort; but conversion depends on its own will. The soul knows that this,
for her, is final grace and, should it show even a flicker of good will, the
mercy of God will accomplish the rest.
My omnipotent mercy is active here. Happy the
soul that takes advantage of this grace.
Jesus: What joy
fills My Heart when you return to Me. Because you are weak, I take you in My
arms and carry you to the home of My Father.
Soul: (as if awakening, asks fearfully): Is it
possible that there is yet mercy for me?
Jesus: There is, My child. You have a special
claim on My mercy. Let it act in your poor soul; let the rays of grace enter
your soul; they bring with them light, warmth, and life.
Soul: But fear fills me at the thought of my
sins, and this terrible fear moves me to doubt Your goodness.
Jesus: My child, all your sins have not wounded
My Heart as painfully as your present lack of trust does - that after so
many efforts of My love and mercy, you should still doubt My goodness.
Soul: O Lord, save me yourself, for I perish.
Be my Savior. O Lord, I am unable to say anything more; my pitiful heart is
torn asunder; but You, O Lord...
Jesus does not let the soul finish but, raising it from the ground, from the
depths of its misery, he leads it into the recesses of His Heart where all
its sins disappear instantly, consumed by the flames of love.
Jesus: Here, soul, are all the treasures of My
Heart. Take everything you need from it.
Soul: O Lord, I am inundated with Your grace. I
sense that a new life has entered into me and, above all, I feel Your love
in my heart. That is enough for me. O Lord, I will glorify the omnipotence
of Your mercy for all eternity. Encouraged by Your goodness, I will confide
to You all the sorrows of my heart.
Jesus: Tell Me all, My child, hide nothing from
Me because My loving Heart, the Heart of Your Best Friend is listening to
you.
Soul: O Lord, now I see all my ingratitude and
Your goodness. You were pursuing me with Your grace, while I was frustrating
Your benevolence. I see that I deserve the depths of hell for spurning Your
graces.
Jesus (interrupting): Do not be absorbed in your
misery - you are still too weak to speak of it - but, rather, gaze on My
Heart filled with goodness, and be imbued with My sentiments. Strive for
meekness and humility; be merciful to others, as I am to you; and, when you
feel your strength failing, if you come to the fountain of mercy to fortify
your soul, you will not grow weary on your journey.
Soul: Now I understand Your mercy, which
protects me and like a brilliant star, leads me into the home of my Father,
protecting me from all the horrors of hell that I have deserved, not once,
but a thousand times. O Lord, eternity will hardly suffice for me to give
due praise to Your unfathomable mercy and Your compassion for me.
Conversation of the Merciful God with a Suffering Soul.
Jesus: Poor soul, I see that you suffer much and
that you so not have even the strength to converse with me. So I will speak
to you. Even though your sufferings were very great, do not lose heart or
give in to despondency. But tell Me, My child, who has dared to wound your
heart? Tell Me about everything, be sincere in dealing with Me, reveal all
the wounds of your heart. I will heal them, and your suffering will become a
source of your sanctification.
Soul: Lord, my sufferings are so great and
numerous and have lasted so long that I become discouraged.
Jesus: My child, do not be discouraged. I know
your boundless trust in Me; I know you are aware of My goodness and mercy.
Let us talk in detail about everything that weighs so heavily upon your
heart.
Soul: There are so many different things that I
do not know what to speak about first, nor how to express it.
Jesus: Talk to Me simply, as a friend to a
friend. Tell Me now, My child, what hinders you from advancing in holiness?
Soul: Poor health detains me on the way to
holiness. I cannot fulfill my duties. I am as useless as an extra wheel on a
wagon. I cannot mortify myself or fast to any extent, as the saints did.
Further more, nobody believes I am sick, so that mental pain is added to
those of the body, and I am often humiliated. Jesus, how can anyone become
holy in such circumstances?
Jesus: True, My child, all that is painful. But
there is no way to heaven except the way of the cross. I followed it first.
You must learn that it is the shortest and surest way.
Soul: Lord, there is another obstacle on the
road to holiness. Because I am faithful to You, I am persecuted and suffer
much.
Jesus: It is because you are not of this world
that the world hates you. First it persecuted Me. Persecution is a sign that
you are following in My footsteps faithfully.
Soul: My Lord, I am also discouraged because
neither my superiors nor my confessor understand my interior trials. A
darkness clouds my mind. How can I advance? All this discourages me from
striving for the heights of sanctity.
Jesus: Well, My child, this time you have told Me
a great deal. I realize how painful it is not to be understood, and
especially by those whom one loves and with whom one has been very open. But
suffice it is to know that I understand all your troubles and misery. I am
pleased by the deep faith you have, despite everything, in My
representatives. Learn from this that no one will understand a soul entirely
- that is beyond human ability. Therefore, I have remained on earth to
comfort your aching heart and to fortify your soul, so that you will not
falter on the way. You say that a dense darkness is obscuring your mind. But
why, at such times, do you not come to Me, the light who can in an instant
pour into your soul more understanding about holiness than can be found in
any books? No confessor is capable of teaching and enlightening a soul this
way.
Know, too, that the darkness about which you complain I first endured in the
Garden of Olives when My Soul was crushed in mortal anguish. I am giving you
a share in those sufferings because of My special love for you and in view
of the high degree of holiness I am intending for you in heaven. A suffering
soul is closest to My Heart.
Soul: One more thing, Lord. What should I do
when I am ignored and rejected by people, especially by those on whom I had
a right to count in times of greatest need?
Jesus: My child, make the resolution never to
rely on people. Entrust yourself completely to My will saying, "Not as I
want, but according to Your will, O God, let it be done unto me." These
words, spoken from the depths of one's heart, can raise a soul to the summit
of sanctity in a short time. In such a soul I delight. Such a soul gives Me
glory. Such a soul fills heaven with the fragrance of her virtue. But
understand that the strength by which you bear suffering comes from frequent
Communions. So approach this fountain of mercy often, to draw with the
vessel of trust whatever you need.
Soul: Thank You, Lord, for Your goodness in
remaining with us in this exile as the God of mercy and blessing us with the
radiance of Your compassion and goodness. It is through the light of Your
mercy that I have come to understand how much You love me.
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CATHOLIC TEACHING/CONVICTION/TESTIMONY |
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Testimony of Nita
Whitten, former Abortion Provider
(This testimony was originally given
at a "Meet the Abortion Providers" workshop sponsored by the Pro-life
Action League of Chicago, directed by Joe Scheidler. Priests for Life
offers their video, "Inside the Abortion Industry," containing excerpts
of the testimonies of many former providers.
Contact us for more details.)
(continued)I'm going to tell you
some gory details that happened at the clinic that I remember
specifically. There was a woman who came in the clinic who was forcing
her daughter to have an abortion. This wasn't uncommon at all; it
happened all the time. Since I was on the front desk a lot of times,
filling in for the receptionist, or if they were out sick, I got to see
this firsthand. I wasn't really as adept as some of the other girls
because I wasn't always up there. I was usually in the back typing,
filling out papers, and basically paying the bills, doing the things
that secretaries do.
This woman forced her daughter to come in there and she was a second
trimester, probably about 15 weeks. They had inserted the laminaria the
day before, and she was in there and quite miserable. The poor girl was
really upset and she kept going to the bathroom, and obviously there was
something wrong with her physically, and when she went into the bathroom
the next time, all of a sudden she started screaming at the top of her
lungs. It's a baby; it's a baby; mama, mama, mama! She was screaming in
the middle of our clinic. So I'm freaking out and trying to figure out
what's going on. I called Holly, her counselor, and said, Holly, she's
aborted the baby in the bathroom and you need to get the doctor right
now. Well, he was in a procedure and couldn't come then. None of the
nurses knew what to do, so they got her back there real quick and took
care of her. But I firmly believe without the grace of God and the
healing power of Jesus Christ that she's going to be scarred emotionally
from having seen that baby in the toilet, because that's where it
landed.
You see, when the girls come into these clinics, they don't .know, nine
times out of ten, what's going to happen to them. They get a package
deal--it's like going to get your teeth fixed or something. This is what
we're going to do to you; it won't hurt very much; it's going to cost
this--pay cash. They don't tell you what the baby looks like; they don't
tell you how long it's going to take; they don't tell you it's going to
hurt. And it hurts; it's a baby; and it's a waste of your money.
One of the things that happened a lot of times is that women would be
referred by their doctor because they didn't want to have that
particular baby. There was one woman who came in and she was pregnant
with twins. She had a family; she was a normal person; she could have
that baby; there was no problem having babies; she got pregnant on
purpose but when she found out it was twins she decided to have an
abortion because there were twins. She did it on purpose. Her doctor
referred her to us because there was twins. So she came into the clinic
and I remember when they took the little fetuses, the little babies,
back to the lab room and they were looking at them. Everybody came in to
look.
I went in to look. I wanted to see what twin babies looked like.
That was really the first time I really looked at the babies. I had
never really looked; I hadn't been in the procedure room; I didn't know.
I knew what they said. Curtis made films and stuff, but I didn't pay
much attention to that because I wasn't a doctor and I wasn't a nurse. I
was a secretary, and I kind of wanted to avoid thinking about those
little babies. Because you see, in my heart, I knew they were babies,
and I knew it was murder, and I knew it was wrong.
One thing that happened at the clinic that I worked at that was
incredibly devastating, right before I left. Dr. Boyd had made an
agreement with a doctor, and I cannot name this doctor because I just
don't think it would be wise to name him today, but he was the Director
of Fetal Research at the University of Texas Health Science Center at
that time. He had made an agreement with this doctor to give him our
large babies for him to do fetal research on. They did this, and I
believe at the time, it was against the law. I don't know if it is now,
and I'm not familiar with the legal terms because I'm not a lawyer, but
I remember we were told not to tell anyone, and they only came in secret
to get the babies.
What happened in the clinic, though, was the thing that sort of made me
start thinking about getting out of there. They brought their research
assistant in because Curtis is so interested in technology and all these
weird things he liked to do. He had them come in and they dissected a
baby for us in our lab room so we could see what they were doing with
the body parts. They did that right there and everybody filed in and
looked. I looked at it. I pretended like I was being brave and walked
out. It made me sick.
One of the things that happened as I worked at the clinic was that I
became extremely depressed, extremely despondent, and basically hooked
on drugs. I had done "fun" drugs before I started working at the clinic
because, you know, when you're that age, peer pressure, I thought it was
fun and I enjoyed that. But when I worked there I had to take drugs to
cope. I took drugs to wake up in the morning; I took speed while I was
at work; and I smoked marijuana, drank lots of alcohol, and took
anything else I could buy with the money that I made. This was a daily
thing. I'm not talking about on weekends; I'm saying that this is the
way that I coped with what I did. It was horrible to work there and
there was no good in it.
In January, right before I left, I started having problems with my
period, and I was on birth control pills and assumed that there was no
way that I could get pregnant. Basically, what happened was that I
developed amenorrhea, but I didn't know that at the time. I thought I
was pregnant. Now this nurse who I worked with was just a regular nurse;
she wasn't an OB nurse; she wasn't trained. And the nurses did
ultrasounds on the large babies before the doctor did the procedure, and
he would look at the picture, and they thought they knew what they were
doing. They had no idea what they were doing. You have to be a
technician to really run an ultrasound machine the way you're supposed
to. They had no training in ultrasound machines other than what Glenna
Boyd taught them. That was it. Glenna Boyd isn't even a doctor or a
nurse.
They did an ultrasound on me and did pregnancy tests and couldn't find
out what was wrong. They decided I was pregnant and they inserted a
laminaria in me. I went home with a bottle of valiums; I had 10, 10 mg.
valiums, and my husband now but who I was living with at the time, said
that I took the whole bottle that night. I took them one at a time. I
started at 5:00 in the morning and by the time I got back to the clinic
the next morning at about 9:00 1 had taken the whole bottle and don't
remember that very well because after you take a couple you don't
remember things.
I was in such severe pain I could not think. It was the most
excruciating pain I have ever felt in my life, and only by the grace of
God can I even tell you about it. I went into the clinic the next
morning and at our clinic they used nitrous oxide, pericervical blocks,
and Sublimaze, and that's how they did the procedures. So they hooked me
up to all this and my counselor was one of the girls I worked with and
she was there to help me cope with this situation. They were going to do
this abortion on me. They got in there and discovered that I wasn't even
pregnant in the first place. I was just totally baffled by all this. Why
did they do this to me if I wasn't pregnant? I worked for them; they
ought to know better; how come this happened? Well, when I went home
that day I was still in a lot of pain, so they referred me to the little
doctor that they always have on call. I went to him and he told me I had
a severe pelvic infection and couldn't believe that they did this to me.
He gave me some antibiotics and told me I would be all right.
I wasn't satisfied with his answer so I went to my mother's doctor, and
he said the same thing, that basically they did a terrible thing; they
made a big mistake; I wasn't pregnant. Why did they do this? They
couldn't imagine why and I was really sick with this pelvic inflammatory
disease. They gave me some more medicine. I took the medicine and got
over that, but I took off work for six weeks. While I was off of work,
they still paid me and they had to call me to get the directions on how
to pay the salaries. I was the only one who knew how to fill out the
checks and do all the accounting part of it.
It's funny, because the girl who was the director of the clinic at that
time, named Marty, is a Catholic. I was sort of baffled by her. She was
an unusual person. She called on the phone and I told her that I never
wanted to talk to her again. You did this to me and I wasn't even
pregnant. Don't you know any better? What's wrong with you? Why would
you do this to me? She just said, calm down, it's not the end of the
world. I was still taking my illegal drugs and my legal drugs, trying to
cope.
I finally got back to work,, and while I was there, in the spring, Marty
and I were there. I came in about 9:00 and there were fire trucks all
around our clinic and I couldn't imagine why. The funny thing is that we
were struck by lightning. I am serious. It burnt out every major
electric appliance, including the abortion machines.
No one was there when it happened. It was right before we arrived. We
were shut down for a week. God did it. I pray ... Oh, Father, send Your
angels in there and unplug those machines; cause a malfunction in the
machines because if You stop them from working they can't work that day.
That shuts them down.
One of the interesting things that happened at the clinic, and I'm going
to be very brave and share this. There was a lot of perversion that went
on through the people who worked at this clinic. We had accountants that
were from San Antonio, I believe, an outside firm, and they did the
accounting. They had come in to check with us and get my books and to
get the check stubs and to reconcile the bank. They came in and Curtis
decided to show one of his sexuality films. Curtis is a real unusual
man. You'd have to meet him to know what I'm trying to explain to you.
So we all gathered in the waiting room, all of the employees on Monday
when we were closed. He showed a film of people having sex that had all
this wonderful narrative about how come we should have "sexual freedom,"
while these accountants were there and all of us girls who worked there.
Personally, at the time I thought that was real funny.
But I look back on that now and I am just shocked, really shocked.
Because, you see, this kind of mentality is what's causing us to have a
problem with abortion in the first place, that we can just have sex
whenever we want to, with anybody we want to, that we can just do
whatever we want to. That's basically what the morality of our society
has become. You can't watch television in the evenings without being
assaulted with adultery, fornication, things that are not from God. You
can't even go anywhere where it's not there. What's so sad is that there
are Christians today and Jewish people who have a covenant with
God--they know good and evil just like we know good and evil--that those
things are not from God. I'll tell you where they're from. They're from
Satan himself. And he's set to destroy and to kill and to steal from
you. If you let him in your home by the television or however else you
might let him in, he'll take something from you, including your kids
when they grow up. A word to the wise.
After they did this abortion on me when I wasn't pregnant and after we
got struck by lightning, my husband (who wasn't my husband then) a
mathematician, decided to go back to college and get his Master's
Degree, and I praise God because he was willing to say, okay, we're
moving. I really wanted to get out of the clinic and I said, I'm getting
out of the rat race. I hated living in Dallas. I wanted to be a country
girl. I'm still a country girl and live out in the country now. I wanted
to get back to natural things. I was really kind of the "hippie"
personality with long hair and drugs and free sex.
We decided to move and so I resigned, and at my resigning party, a huge
party where we got so drunk that I really don't remember anything else
about it. That was just the way that it was. Every time we did anything
together we either did drugs; a lot of the people were involved in
strange sexual relationships; that was just the life of the clinic. That
was how the people who worked in that clinic lived. So obviously there
is a sin problem going on. There were a lot of medical things that they
did that I don't agree with. Like Dr. McMillan brought out, if they're
such good doctors, how come they don't report their complications? How
come they don't turn it in to pathology?
I moved to Nacagdoches, Texas and God put me where I went. I got a job
at the hospital there, at Nacagdoches Memorial Hospital, praise God!
It's funny because I told them where I worked and I had this funny
notion that good patient care was what I had seen. There wasn't good
patient care, but I thought it was, sort of, in my mind. I couldn't
justify what they did to me, but I thought this was just the way it was.
I got a job in the medical transcribing department because I'm a really
fast typist. When you type medical records all day long you learn a lot.
You know a lot. You find out everything the doctor did, everything is
dictated and I learned all about how you have a baby. I typed surgical
procedures and I typed all sorts of reports. There were 180 physicians
in the area who used this 180-bed hospital. All the people who I worked
with in the medical records department were Christians. Four or five of
them were Pentecostals, real old-fashioned Pentecostals who didn't
believe in cutting their hair; they only wore dresses; they believed in
holiness and basically were unusual women.
I took it upon myself as a radical feminist even though I was so
burned-out by the job I had been in, to really embarrass them. I made it
my target to embarrass them. I would cuss in front of them on purpose; I
smoked my cigarettes in front of them on purpose; I told them all about
all my illicit sex dealings in front of them on purpose, and I basically
made their life miserable. Or at least I tried to. This is how I was. I
was a wicked person. I had totally sold out my life to what was wrong
instead of what was good.
Many of the doctors who work at that hospital are Christians. One of
them in particular, Dr. Kagel, and I just loved Dr. Kagel, he signed my
health papers so I could get married. He was an unusual man. He was
never rude. Curtis was always rude. He cared about his patients. They
cared about their patients! I was shocked! I thought that was the way
doctors were supposed to be because of Curtis. They were real kind there
and everything. I didn't fit in very well, but they liked me because I
typed really well and I didn't make errors. So they kept me on.
Well, my life in drugs got even worse at this point because I was a
miserable person, and I was so hooked on drugs that even then every day
I would smoke marijuana and I would take whatever drugs I could afford
to buy. I took just about everything you can take. I thank God that
crack wasn't available then because I'd probably be dead today if it
was. It wasn't available, or at least I didn't know about it.
What happened next is the part of my story that is the most exciting to
me. It was Thanksgiving in 1982 and I went to a friend's party in Pilot
Point, Texas. This was to be basically a drug and alcohol party all
Thanksgiving weekend long. While I was at this party, I became pregnant.
I didn't know it at the time, but I was pregnant. I couldn't really see
me having the baby because I was taking so many drugs and doing so many
things. So I went to Dallas and had an abortion at a different abortion
clinic. When I got back from Dallas after having that abortion, I
started hemorrhaging. I went to the local doctor there in Nacagdoches
and he took me to the obstetrician/gynecologist next door, who I typed
many papers for. He said, you have a cyst on your right ovary that is
extremely large. You are bleeding profusely; we are doing emergency
surgery on you now; you don't even have time to call anybody. My
now-husband, Nathan, was in his final exams for his Master's Degree in
Mathematics, and my mother was over a hundred miles away, and I was
miserable.
My mind was going, oh, my God, I've got an ectopic pregnancy; they
didn't get it; I have cancer; I have this and that. You know how you
think when you're going into emergency surgery. They went in and found a
cyst. The pathologist couldn't decide what the cyst was. I had a few
pieces of placenta still left in me and they scraped that out.
My mother was after me. I didn't have a phone so I called my mom every
so often to see how she was. I called her and she said, please come
home. It's your dad's birthday; it's your brother's birthday; it's
Easter; we want to see you; please come home. So I went home, and while
I was there she begged me to go to church with her. I went to church
with her and while I was at church at this unusual church where they
take Communion and turn the lights down low and someone will sing a
song, and all of a sudden it just occurred to me that I had to talk to
God. I said, God, if you're real, I want them to sing this song. It was
a song that I knew as a child and I always loved to sing. So they
started singing that song. This man way down in the front started
singing that song, and I just broke down crying.
I went home and I still was taking the drugs. On May 1st I had just had
enough with myself. I knew I had to get right with God. I knew it. I
knew that was the only thing that would help me. I lived out in the
country and the only place I could go to church if I wanted to go I had
to walk because Nathan plays golf every Sunday and we only had one car.
So I walked down to the little church, and while I was at the little
church, I gave my life to the Lord Jesus Christ. I submitted to Him
completely and asked Him, if You want me, You know what kind of shape
I'm in, You can have me. And He took me.
I became a new creature at that point. The person that I was before
died. I was no longer the person that I was. I got involved in Christian
circles; I was delivered from drugs, alcohol and illicit sex. Nathan
married me one week later and we're still married. Praise God! This is
the miracle of it all. There was a time in my life that I was so bitter
that I would never be able to have children that I couldn't talk about
it. I couldn't talk about abortion; I couldn't talk about this.
There was a woman at my church who had a lot of compassion for me. She
came up to me one Wednesday evening after church and she just grabbed me
and she started praying for me, and she started prophesying over me and
she started speaking about this unborn child in my womb. I thought, she
doesn't know, she doesn't understand. Why is she telling me this? I was
just crying and crying and couldn't understand it. I found out later
that I was pregnant at that time. But I thought that she was just
praying for me because she knew I wanted to have a baby.
I had gone to doctors for so long and I had quit bleeding, and there was
this unusual situation going on, and I thought maybe I am pregnant. The
doctor said, oh, no you're not pregnant, and he gave me this drug. He
said, this is going to start your cycle; if you take this drug in five
days you'll start your cycle. I said, okay, and I took it, and I didn't.
I went back to the doctor about ten times. Finally, they decided that I
was pregnant. The doctor at that time said, Ma'am, because you have
taken all these hormonal drugs and the one they just gave you, we
recommend that you have an abortion, because if you don't your baby will
be deformed. I laughed at him and said, you're crazy, I'm not having an
abortion. I trust God completely, and whether this baby is normal or
not, I'm having it.
While I was pregnant, I sang songs to my
unborn baby because I had heard other people say that babies in the womb
know what's going on. Well, they do. They can hear your voice. They know
God; they talk to God. It says: Their angels are continually beholding
the Father up in Heaven. They are a real live person. This is the baby
that they told me would be deformed.
Johanna is now four years old. She can say all her ABCs; she can write
her name; she can count to 30; she can quote you many Scriptures; and if
you need prayers, she will lay hands on you and pray for you.
I'm going to tell you some things to encourage you today in your fight:
This is spiritual warfare. The devil is the one that has abortion in
this land and we've got to stop him. The only way you can stop him is by
prayer and by intervention. Faith without works is dead. That's why I
commend every one of you who will place your body in between anybody
wanting to kill a baby and the mother. I commend you for that and want
to read Scripture that will encourage you today and cause you to keep up
the effort because this is what they preached to me just last week where
I work. I work for Kent Copeland Ministries and I'm involved with people
all the time who are going through serious crisis who need prayer.
Perhaps they have cancer; perhaps they're dying; perhaps their loved one
has run away.
...I would tell you that you must expose
bad medical care. You must expose the greediness and you must expose the
satanic nature of this. I believe that babies being aborted are just
blood sacrifices to the devil. It wouldn't surprise me a bit if some of
the abortionists who haven't been converted, who are extremely involved
in this, laying their lives on the line, it wouldn't surprise me a bit
to find out that they were an active Satan-worshiper. It wouldn't
surprise me a bit. I can tell you right now, there's deliverance for
those people. God has deliverance. The blood of Jesus can take care of
anything.
I want the Christians to wake up! Down
where I am there are not a lot of opportunities for me to go and speak.
This is only the third time I've really spoken to a major number of
people. Because they don't want to hear the goriness they don't want to
get involved; they want to sit back and have their cake at home and live
their life. I don't do that; I don't want to be involved. Well, if you
don't get involved, the babies are going to die. When your teenagers
grow up, they're going to be confronted with the filthiness and
wickedness of this generation.
One of the reasons why it is such a Satanic warfare is found in Psalms
8:2.
Out of the mouths of babes and
sucklings hast thou ordained strength. Because of thine enemies that
thou might still the enemy and the avenger.
The devil doesn't want babies being born
because he knows that in Genesis the Lord told him, I will bruise your
head with the seed of a woman. That was Jesus Christ and we are his
ambassadors. The devil hates you and he hates your babies. I've got news
for him; he's a defeated fellow; I read the end of the book; he doesn't
have a chance. He doesn't win. He's defeated.
You've got to be protective of the children that you have now, and
you've got to be protective of the children that are in the womb. We've
got to get together and pray. I strongly urge you to get involved in an
intercessory prayer group if you can find one. If you don't have one,
start one. Call out the names of the people involved in abortion, call
out of the names of your Senators, your Congressmen, the United States
President, call out the Supreme Court Justices' names. And let's see it
changed.
God bless you all.
Nita Whitten
(to be continued)
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