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TRÁI TIM
MẸ: NƠI CON NƯƠNG NÁU - ĐƯỜNG ĐẾN VỚI CHÚA |
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"Chúa Giêsu muốn dùng con để làm
cho Mẹ được nhận biết và yêu mến" |
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November 16/2009 - Monday
33rd Week
of
Ordinary Time
LITURGICAL/THEME MEDITATION:
"Jesus asked him, 'What do you want me
to do for you?"
UNIVERSAL CHURCH/WORLD EVENT(S):
On the End Times and God's
Kingdom;
An Atheist Defends Religion
SAINT OF THE DAY
St. Margaret of Scotland
GENERAL
MARIOLOGY
Nativity of the
Virgin Mary
DIVINE MERCY
Divine Mercy in My Soul
My
Preparation for Holy Communion
TEACHING/TESTIMONY/CONVICTION:
Overcoming
Loneliness
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DAILY LITURGICAL MEDITATION |
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Monday (11/16): "Jesus asked him, 'What do
you want me to do for you?"
Scripture: Luke 18:35-43
35 As he drew near to Jericho, a blind man was sitting by the
roadside begging; 36 and hearing a multitude going by, he inquired what
this meant. 37 They told him, "Jesus of Nazareth is passing by." 38 And
he cried, "Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!" 39 And those who were
in front rebuked him, telling him to be silent; but he cried out all the
more, "Son of David, have mercy on me!" 40 And Jesus stopped, and
commanded him to be brought to him; and when he came near, he asked him,
41 "What do you want me to do for you?" He said, "Lord, let me receive
my sight." 42 And Jesus said to him, "Receive your sight; your faith has
made you well." 43 And immediately he received his sight and followed
him, glorifying God; and all the people, when they saw it, gave praise
to God.
Meditation: Have you ever encountered a special moment of
grace, a once in a life-time opportunity you knew you could not pass up?
Such a moment came for a blind and destitute man who heard that Jesus
was passing by. The Gospel of Mark identifies this man as Bartimaeus
(Mark 10:46-52). This blind man was determined to get near the one
person who could meet his need. He knew who Jesus was and had heard of
his fame for healing, but until now had no means of making contact with
the Son of David, a clear reference and title for the Messiah. It
took raw courage and persistence for Bartimaeus to get the attention of
Jesus over the din of a noisy throng who crowded around Jesus as he made
his way out of town. Why was the crowd annoyed with the blind man's
persistent shouts? He was disturbing their peace and interrupting their
conversation with Jesus. It was common for a rabbi to teach as he walked
with others. Jesus was on his way to celebrate the Passover in Jerusalem
and a band of pilgrims followed him. When the crowd tried to silence the
blind man he overpowered them with his loud emotional outburst and thus
caught the attention of Jesus.
This incident reveals something important about how God interacts
with us. The blind man was determined to get Jesus' attention and he was
persistent in the face of opposition. Jesus could have ignored or
rebuffed him because he was interrupting his talk and disturbing his
audience. Jesus showed that acting was more important than talking. This
man was in desparate need and Jesus was ready not only to empathize with
his suffering but to relieve it as well. A great speaker can command
attention and respect, but a man or woman with a helping hand and a big
heart is loved more. Jesus commends Bartimaeus for recognizing who he is
with the eyes of faith and grants him physical sight as well. Do
you recognize your need for God's healing grace and do you seek Jesus
out, like Bartimaeus, with persistent faith and trust in his goodness
and mercy?
Bartimaeus was not only grateful for the gift of faith and the gift
of physical sight, but for the opportunity to now follow Jesus as one of
his disciples. Luke tells us us that he immediately followed Jesus and
gave glory to God. The crowd also gave praise to God when they saw this
double miracle of spiritual and physical vision. Clement of Alexandria,
a 4th century church father, comments on this double vision:
Now that he was delivered from his blindness, did
he neglect the duty of loving Christ? He certainly did not. It says,
“He followed him, offering him glory like to God.” He was set free
from double blindness. Not only did he escape from the blindness of
the body but also from that of the mind and heart. He would not have
glorified him as God, had he not possessed spiritual vision. He
became the means of others giving Christ glory, for it says that all
the people gave glory to God.(Commentary
on Luke, Homily 126)
Do you give glory to God for giving you the eyes of faith to recognize
him as your Lord and Healer?
"Lord Jesus, open the eyes of my heart and mind that I may see and
understand the truth and goodness of your word. May I never fail to
recognize your presence with me and to call upon your saving grace in my
time of need and healing."
Psalm 1
1 Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor
stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers;
2 but his delight is in the law of the LORD, and on his law he meditates
day and night.
3 He is like a tree planted by streams of water, that yields its fruit
in its season, and its leaf does not wither. In all that he does, he
prospers.
4 The wicked are not so, but are like chaff which the wind drives away.
5 Therefore the wicked will not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in
the congregation of the righteous;
6 for the LORD knows the way of the righteous, but the way of the wicked
will perish.
www.dailyscripture.net
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UNIVERSAL CHURCH/WORLD EVENTS |
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On the End Times and God's
Kingdom
"Behold the Power of the Word of Christ"
VATICAN CITY, NOV. 15, 2009 ( Zenit.org).-
Here is a translation of the public address
Benedict XVI gave today before praying the
midday Angelus with the pilgrims gathered in
St. Peter's Square.
* * *
Dear Brothers and Sisters!
We have reached the last two weeks of the
liturgical year. We thank the Lord who has
enabled us to carry out, yet again, this
journey of faith -- old and always new -- in
the great spiritual family of the Church! It
is an inestimable gift, which allows us to
live in history the mystery of Christ,
receiving in the furrows of our personal and
community existence the seed of the Word of
God, seed of eternity that transforms this
world from within and opens it to the
Heavenly Kingdom. Accompanying us in the
itinerary of Sunday biblical readings was
St. Mark's Gospel, which today presents a
part of Jesus' discourse on the end times.
In this discourse, there is a phrase that is
striking for its synthetic clarity: "Heaven
and earth will pass away, but my words will
not pass away" (Mark 13:31). Let us reflect,
for a moment, on this prophecy of Christ.
The expression "heaven and earth" is
frequent in the Bible to indicate the whole
universe, the entire cosmos. Jesus says that
all this is destined to "pass." Not only the
earth, but also heaven, understood, in fact,
in the cosmic sense, not as a synonym of
God. Sacred Scripture knows no ambiguity:
The whole of creation is marked by
finiteness, including the elements divinized
by ancient mythologies: There is no
confusion between creation and the Creator,
but rather a clear difference. With such a
clear distinction, Jesus affirms that his
words "will not pass," that is, they come
from the part of God and because of this are
eternal.
However, pronounced in the concreteness
of his earthly existence, they are prophetic
words par excellence, as Jesus affirms in
another place, addressing the celestial
Father: "for I have given them the words
which thou gave me, and they have received
them and know in truth that I came from thee
and they have believed that thou didst send
me" (John 17:8). In a well-known parable,
Christ compares himself to the sower and
explains that the seed is the Word (cfr Mark
4:14): Those who hear it, receive it and
bear fruit (cfr Mark 4:20) are part of the
Kingdom of God, that is, they live under his
lordship; they remain in the world , but are
no longer of the world; therefore, in them
is a seed of eternity, a principle of
transformation that already now is
manifested in a good life, animated by
charity, and in the end will produce the
resurrection of the flesh. Behold the power
of the Word of Christ.
Dear friends, the Virgin Mary is the
living sign of this truth. Her heart was
"good earth" that received with full
disposition the Word of God, so that all her
existence, transformed according to the
image of the Son, was introduced into
eternity, soul and body, anticipating the
eternal vocation of every human being. Now,
in prayer, let us make our own her response
to the Angel: "let it be to me according to
your word" (Luke 1:38), so that, following
Christ on the way of the Cross, we might
also be able to come to the glory of the
Resurrection.
An Atheist
Defends Religion
New Book Blasts Attacks by
Unbelievers
By Father John Flynn, LC
ROME, NOV. 15, 2009 (Zenit.org).-
The Catholic Church is one
of the greatest forces for
evil in the world, at least
according to atheist Richard
Dawkins. This is just the
latest of many volleys by
him against religion and
God.
His remarks were
published Oct. 23 on the
religion section of the
Washington Post's Web site,
when he was asked to comment
on the move by the Catholic
Church to facilitate the
entry of Anglicans.
The polemics over
religion raised by the spate
of books and commentaries in
recent years continues to
flow freely. A recent debate
in London on the motion that
the "Catholic Church is a
force for good in the
world," attracted over 2,000
people, the Catholic Herald
reported Oct. 23.
Stephen Fry and
Christopher Hitchens, who
argued the negative case,
enjoyed a substantial win
over their opponents -- Ann
Widdecombe, a conservative
party parliamentarian, and
Archbishop Onaiyekan of
Abuja in Nigeria --
obtaining 1,876 votes
against 268.
Another recent example
comes from Australia
columnist where Catherine
Deveny put God on the
psychiatrist's couch and
proclaimed that: "God has
narcissistic personality
disorder."
In her Sept. 2 article
published by the Age
newspaper, Deveny asserted
that God suffers from
"feelings of grandiosity,"
and an "obsession with
fantasies of success," along
with being "devoid of
empathy," and "behaves
arrogantly."
The atheists' offensive
has in its turn given rise
to numerous books defending
God and organized religion.
An interesting turn in the
debate comes from a book
just published by someone
who does not believe in God,
but still defends religion.
Better off
In "An Atheist Defends
Religion: Why Humanity is
Better Off with Religion
Than Without It," (Alpha
Books), Bruce Sheiman offers
a new perspective to the
contest between believers
and atheists.
The "God question" can't
be resolved to the
satisfaction of the
contending sides, he states
but what Sheiman does set
out to do is to consider the
value of religion itself. He
does not seek to prove God
exists, but defends religion
as a cultural institution.
Regarding his personal
views, Sheiman explains that
he is not a person of faith,
but he does not "stridently
repudiate God." He describes
himself as an "aspiring
theist" because "religion
provides a combination of
psychological, emotional,
moral communal, existential,
and even physical-health
benefits that no other
institution can replicate."
The best way to
convincingly dismiss the
case for atheism, he
explains in his introduction
to the book, is not by
arguments that seek to prove
the existence of God, but to
demonstrate the enduring
contribution of religion.
"Religion's misdeeds may
make for provocative
history, but the everyday
good works of billions of
people is the real history
of religion, one that
parallels the growth and
prosperity of humankind,"
Sheiman affirms.
One way that religion
benefits us is by giving our
lives meaning, Sheiman
notes. We are aware we live
in a world of great power
and potentiality, but in
contrast to animals that
just live in a utilitarian
relationship with the world,
humans are aware that this
world exists apart from
ourselves.
Sheiman then recounts
some examples of how
primitive societies sought
to give sense to their lives
in the midst of the wider
world by means of religion.
Their myths and rituals
helped those peoples to
connect the mortal realities
to the eternal and
spiritual.
In the modern world
science has in many cases
replaced religion in terms
of explaining the world and
the universe, but Sheiman
points out, while we can
accept what science says
about how the universe
works, this does not explain
to us what it means for our
lives.
In other words, how the
world works is not the same
as why the world works. In
our drive to discover what
Sheiman terms lowercase
truth -- facts and knowledge
-- we have sacrificed
uppercase truth -- meaning
and purpose.
Moral nature
Another aspect of
religion is morality. It's
clear that people can be
moral without religion,
Sheiman affirms, but it's
also evident that religion
makes people good. In fact,
he asserts, humans exhibit
ethical behavior that goes
well beyond the explanatory
power of group cohesiveness.
Sheiman cites research
that demonstrates how
religious activity is
associated with greater
social interaction. Just as
religion builds community,
so too does it foment
morality, he adds.
It does this through an
understanding that moral
action is the path to a
union with God and that we
have some sort of moral
contract whereby doing good
means we participate in the
highest good
Intrinsic to all
religions is a belief in
goodness, both that of the
divine and that of humanity,
Sheiman explains. Atheists
often lack an understanding
of religious morality, he
argues. It's not a simple
reward/punishment system.
"The most cynical see in
religion a blind obedience
to moral authority and an
oppressive
behavioral-control system,"
he commented.
While some religious
adherents exhibit an
authoritarian orientation,
this can also be the case
for just as many
non-religious people,
Sheiman maintains. For most
people God is seen as a
loving father, and the moral
high ground to which humans
aspire, he asserted.
One contribution of
religion to society that
Sheiman highlights is the
Christian notion that humans
are made in the image of
God. Since humans are meant
to share in the divine
nature they are to be
respected as children of
God.
Such a view leads to
countless acts of sacrifice
and compassion every day, he
comments. In fact,
sociological studies reveal
that religious people are
more caring and
compassionate than their
non-religious peers and give
more money to charity. This
practice is not restricted
to a particular religion,
Sheiman points out.
Religion also provides a
solid foundation for moral
behavior through an
adherence to absolute
values. By contrast, Sheiman
notes, without religion
people can have a morality,
but if the moral precepts
are man-made they become
fallible and insubstantial,
a function of personal
opinions or even calculating
self-interest.
This leads him to comment
that our minds are called to
something more than a
relative truth. As humans we
strive to find the first
cause and if moral
imperatives do not depend on
God then they are not
absolute and remain
relative.
Science by itself cannot
lead to a moral culture, he
continues. "Right and wrong
do not come from physics or
biology," he states.
"Religion thus becomes
the most important cultural
and institutional source of
ethical principles precisely
because it is felt to be
above human caprice," he
adds.
Progress
In another chapter of the
book, Sheiman relates how
religion was behind the
Western world's progress in
such fields as democracy and
freedom, and science and
technology.
Over time if we have
grown as a civilization it
has been at least partly
because of religion, he
argues. While this does not
absolve religious leaders
for their destructive acts
it does lead us to conclude
that overall religion has
had an overall positive
impact, he concludes.
The alternative
conclusion is that we would
be further along in our
progressive trajectory
without religion. This is
implausible, Sheiman
maintains, as historians
cannot identify any other
cultural force as robust as
religion that could have
carried civilization along.
Sheiman also criticizes
the selective reading of
history by some atheists,
who are only too quick to
attribute the most negative
aspects of history to
religion, while rarely
conceding the debt
civilization owes to
religion.
A believer could well
reply to Sheiman that his
faith in God does not depend
on some kind of profit and
loss accounting of history
or his personal life.
Nonetheless, at a time when
many atheists denigrate
churches and faith as
totally irrational and
negative, Sheiman's book
serves as a useful antidote
to such a superficial and
irrational attack on belief.
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DAILY LITURGICAL SAINT |
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http://www.americancatholic.org/Features/SaintofDay
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GENERAL
MARIOLOGY |
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Nativity of the Virgin Mary
The Gospel of Pseudo-Matthew
Translation by Saint Jerome
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Nativity
of the Virgin Mary
CHAP. 1.
(1) -- In those days there was a man in
Jerusalem, Joachim by
name, of the tribe of Judah. He was the shepherd
of his own sheep, fearing
the Lord in integrity and singleness of heart.
He had no other care than
that of his herds, from the produce of which he
supplied with food all that
feared God, offering double gifts in the fear of
God to all who laboured in
doctrine, and who ministered unto Him. Therefore
his lambs, and his sheep,
and his wool, and all things whatsoever he
possessed, he used to divide
into three portions: one he gave to the orphans,
the widows, the strangers,
and the poor; the second to those that
worshipped God; and the third he
kept for himself and all his house. (2) And as
he did so, the Lord
multiplied to him his herds, so that there was
no man like him in the
people of Israel. This now he began to do when
he was fifteen years old.
And at the age of twenty he took to wife Anna,
the daughter of Achar, of
his own tribe, that is, of the tribe of Judah,
of the family of David. And
though they had lived together for twenty years,
he had by her neither sons
nor daughters. (3)
CHAP. 2. --
And it happened that, in the time of the feast,
among those
who were offering incense to the Lord, Joachim
stood getting ready his
gifts in the sight of the Lord. And the priest,
Ruben by name, coming to
him, said: It is not lawful for thee to stand
among those who are doing
sacrifice to God, because God has not blessed
thee so as to give thee seed
in lsrael. Being therefore put to shame in the
sight of the people, he
retired from the temple of the Lord weeping, and
did not return to his
house, but went to his flocks, taking with him
his shepherds into the
mountains to a far country, so that for five
months his wife Anna could
hear no tidings of him. And she prayed with
tears, saying: O Lord, most
mighty God of Israel, why hast Thou, seeing that
already Thou hast not
given me children, taken from me my husband
also? Behold, now five months
that I have not seen my husband; and I know not
where he is tarrying; (4)
nor, if I knew him to be dead, could I bury him.
And while she wept
excessively, she entered into the court of His
house; and she fell on her
face in prayer, and poured out her supplications
before the Lord. After
this, rising from her prayer, and lifting her
eyes to God, she saw a
sparrow's nest in a laurel tree, (5) and uttered
her voice to the Lord with
groaning, and said: Lord God Almighty, who hast
given offspring to every
creature, to beasts wild and tame, to serpents,
and birds, and fishes, and
they all rejoice over their young ones, Thou
hast shut out me alone from
the gift of Thy benignity. For Thou, O God,
knowest my heart, that from the
beginning of my married life I have vowed that,
if Thou, O God, shouldst
give me son or daughter, I would offer them to
Thee in Thy holy temple.
And while she was thus speaking, suddenly an
angel of the Lord appeared
before her, saying: Be not afraid, Anna, for
there is seed for thee in the
decree of God; and all generations even to the
end shall wonder at that
which shall be born of thee. And when he had
thus spoken, he vanished out
of her sight. But she, in fear and dread because
she had seen such a sight,
and heard such words, at length went into her
bed-chamber, and threw
herself on the bed as if dead. And for a whole
day and night she remained
in great trembling and in prayer. And after
these things she called to her
her servant, and said to her: Dost thou see me
deceived in my widowhood and
in great perplexity, and hast thou been
unwilling to come in to me? Then
she, with a slight murmur, thus answered and
said: If God hath shut up thy
womb, and hath taken away thy husband from thee,
what can I do for thee?
And when Anna heard this, she lifted up her
voice, and wept aloud. |
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DIVINE MERCY
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Divine Mercy In my soul
The Mercy of the Lord I will sing Forever.
Divine Mercy in my soul.
Sr. Faustina, Diary
My Preparation for
Holy Communion
J.M.J.
Cracow, January 10,
1938
Sister Mary Faustina
Of the Blessed Sacrament
Congregation of the Sisters
Of Our Lady of Mercy
The most solemn moment of my life is the moment when I receive Holy
Communion. I long for each Holy Communion, and for every Holy Communion I
give thanks to the Most Holy Trinity.
If the angels were capable of envy, they would envy us for two things: one
is the receiving of Holy Communion, and the other is suffering.
Today, I am preparing myself for your coming as a bride does for the coming
of her bridegroom. He is a great Lord, this bridegroom of mine. The heavens
cannot contain Him. The Seraphim who stand closest to Him cover their faces
and repeat unceasingly: Holy, Holy, Holy.
This great Lord is my Bridegroom. It is to Him that the Choirs sing. It is
before Him that the Thrones bow down. By His splendor the sun is eclipsed.
And yet this great Lord is my Bridegroom. My heart, desists from this
profound meditation on how others adore Him, for you no longer have time for
that, as He is coming and is already at your door.
I go out to meet Him, and I invite Him to the dwelling place of my heart,
humbling myself profoundly before His majesty. But the Lord lifts me up from
the dust and invites me, as His bride, to sit next to Him and to tell Him
everything that is on my heart. And I, set at ease by His kindness, lean my
head on His breast and tell Him everything. In the first place, I tell Him
things I would never tell to any creature. And then, I speak about the needs
of the Church, about the souls of poor sinners and about how much they have
need of His mercy. But the time passes quickly. Jesus, I must go to carry
out the duties that are awaiting me. Jesus tells me that there is still a
moment in which to say farewell. A deep mutual gaze, and we seemingly
separate for a while, but, in reality, we never do. Our hearts are
constantly united. Though outwardly I am distracted by my various duties,
the presence of Jesus plunges me constantly in profound recollection.
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CATHOLIC TEACHING/CONVICTION/TESTIMONY |
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| by Ky Nguyen
ost of us are familiar with the experience of
loneliness. As much as we dislike it, loneliness is a
part of growth and change as we face various situations
in our life. Each of us is different and therefore, we
will also feel lonely under different conditions.
Loneliness, as I think we all can realize from
experience, is not necessarily being alone. There are
times when we are alone for an entire day but it doesn't
make us feel lonely. On the other hand, sometimes we are
attending a party at a friend's house with dozens of
people present, but inside, there seems to be an
inescapable feeling of loneliness. We may also have a
similar feeling even though we are sitting in a college
class with two hundred other students, or among fifty
thousand people at a football game.
Loneliness is not a pleasant feeling. When I feel
lonely, I am aware that I am very disconnected from my
surrounding, my family and friends. I feel like there is
something about me that others cannot understand and my
friends are not there to attend to my needs like they
should. Sometimes, I even begin to feel that there is
something about me that turns people off, makes me
unlikable, and makes me not worth others' time.
While loneliness does seem at times inescapable, it
is a condition that we can overcome if we examine what
loneliness is about and find ways to stop it from
consuming our life. First, it is necessary that we turn
away from the misconceptions about loneliness. Many of
us often view loneliness as a sign of weakness or lack
of maturity. We feel that if we were strong, we would
never suffer the feeling of helplessness that comes with
loneliness. Second, loneliness is often misconceived as
a sign that there is something inherently wrong with us.
This feeling is intensified when we see other people our
age having the time of their life. We are then led to
question about what is wrong with us that prevents us
from being able to enjoy life like our peers do. Third,
when feeling lonely, we automatically think that we are
the only one who feels this way. It is precisely this
feeling that causes us to feel more disconnected with
our surroundings. In fact, loneliness is not an
extremely rare condition and at any one time, chances
are many people are going through the same problem as we
are.
There are many negative effects resulting from
pervasive loneliness. First, we will tend to perceive
ourselves in a negative way, whether it is physical
appearance or academic performance. Everything becomes
seen in a negative light. Second, we may blame ourselves
for feeling the way we do and mistakenly conclude that
no one likes us. Third, we may become passive and
refrain from participating in social or academic
activities. Instead, we expect that others recognize our
need and attempt to include us in what they are doing.
If this need is not met, we may become angry, withdrawn,
and further isolated from other activities. Fourth, we
have greater difficulty in taking social risks, in
asserting ourselves, in making phone calls to initiate
social contact, in introducing ourselves to others, in
participating in groups, and in enjoying ourselves at
parties. Fifth, we will have less skill in talking about
ourselves, less skill in responding to others, and a
greater tendency to approach social encounters with
cynicism and mistrust.
Beside those listed above, there are many other
effects that come with loneliness if the feeling is not
overcome. When feeling lonely, we must tell ourselves
that this is not a defect and that the feeling can be
easily overcome and changed. The only person that can
change the situation, however, is the person who is
feeling lonely. There is not much that others can do to
help if the individual does not first take the
initiative to change his own situation.
Loneliness, as we should realize, is an important
signal that perhaps important needs in ourselves are not
being met. We all have needs, and the trick is for us to
reflect on our own situation and identify the specific
needs in our lives. Perhaps it is a need for a close
friendship with someone. Perhaps it is a need for a
close relationship with family members. Perhaps it is a
need to develop some talents that we have. Or it may be
also a need to feel more confidently about who we are
and what we do.
Having identified the needs in our life, we can then
take concrete steps to fulfill these needs. If it is a
need for closer friends, there are various things we can
do. We may seek out situations that enable us to meet
new people. For example, at school, we may search out
for student organizations that interest us. At church,
we may find new friends in participating in a church
choir, in a prayer group, or on a group retreat. In
these places, people are generally open and welcoming to
new members. We may be surprised to find how friendly
people can be. Second, we may take on activities that
truly interest us. For example, if we like photography,
chances are, we will be able to meet other people in a
photography club with whom we have many things in common
and can exchange conversations.
In all these situations, however, it is important
that we learn to be assertive. We can practice being
assertive by saying hello to a student in class whom we
don't know, or start a conversation with a stranger on
the bus, or get involved in discussions in class. Being
assertive also means taking initiative in meeting people
to whom we are attracted. At a party, if we see someone
interesting, we cannot simply sit in the corner and
expect that person to come say hello. We may have to
wait all night before anything happens, if it happens at
all. Make eye contact, smile, or better yet, walk over
and say "hello."
One of the things that is difficult for people trying
to overcome loneliness is trying not to judge others.
Oftentimes, we judge new people on the basis of past
relationships. What we must do, instead, is try to see
each person from a fresh perspective. Give every new
person a chance by slowly getting to know them. It is
not healthy to impose our own expectations on others, or
rush into intimate friendships by sharing too much about
ourselves or asking the other person to share more than
they want to. The process must be allowed to develop
naturally and comfortably.
Loneliness can be minimized if we also take steps to
develop ourselves. First, it is important that we follow
habits of good nutrition, regular exercise, and adequate
sleep. Second, use our free time to get to know
ourselves. Look at this time as an opportunity to
develop independence and to learn to take care of our
own emotional needs. Third, use our free time to enjoy
ourselves rather than just existing until we will be
with others. We are who we are when we alone and not
just when we are in the company of others. Avoid merely
vegetating (sitting around being bored, doing nothing).
Deal with the situation actively by recognizing that
there are many creative and enjoyable ways to use our
alone time. Fourth, whenever possible, use what we have
enjoyed in the past to help us decide how to enjoy our
alone time now.
In summary, we must not define ourselves as lonely
people. No matter how bad we feel, loneliness will
diminish or even disappear when we focus attention and
energy on needs we can currently meet and when we learn
to develop new ways to meet our other needs. Loneliness
is a very natural part of life, especially for us as
young people who are going through drastic emotional
changes of growing up and discovering new things in
life. Loneliness happens when we move from junior high
to high school, and from high school to college. During
these times of changes, we will discover many
difficulties and this may lead us to feel lonely. But we
must remember that in all these situations, we have two
choices: either to let the feeling of loneliness make us
paralyzed, or work so that we can make ourselves happy
and confident people. The second choice is obviously the
better one!
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